Pregnancy Problems

sexaddict said...
is it appropriate for a 13 year old guy to lose his virginity?

sexaddict said...
my gf just got pregnant and i dont know what to get her for christmas. can you help?

to ur first question: NO! it is definitely NOT appropriate for 13 year olds to have sex-- of any kind! i don't care if it's normal, oral, or anal- you guys should not be having it!!!
ok, if you want to get ur pregnant girlfriend something for christmas (i seriously hope ur not 13!!!) maybe buy her some cute maternity clothes, or maybe u should propose. not in an old fashioned way, u guys could keep going out and take care of the kid together, but u can't walk out on her and ur kid. that would make u a total ass.
<3 Opal

Cutting Crisis

my brother and i fight a lot. last night was the worst though. now i have feelings that i cant control, and i want to start cutting. what should i do? and please dont tell me to tell my parents because that really wouldnt help. thanks.

ok, please do not cut urself! it's dangerous and it's not going to help anything. what you need to do is start doing things to calm yourself down. like yoga or knitting or something. cutting is definitely not the answer, you shouldn't be hurting yourself and it won't accomplish anything. you should probably avoid your brother or at least talk to him about it. Or, this might be a bad idea, you could find like a group where you can talk about stuff. it could really help, just don't do anything that would hurt yourself or others, alright?
<3 Opal

Special Someone

many guys are surprisingly easy to shop for. What's his favorite sports team? Maybe you could get him a cool sweatshirt or hat with his sport's team on it. Or does he play for a sports team? Maybe get him a cool soccerball or football. Sometimes there are those stores that sell signed sports equiptment or pictures, so if you can afford it, go out and buy him something special that's signed by his favorite player.
Now if he's a sensitive guy, i think that he'll enjoy anything you get him, especially if it came from your heart. So i would suggest you make him something. Try a scrapbook you made out of pictures of you two together, or even some songs that both of you like on a cd for him.
Some other creative gift ideas i like are engraved dog tags because i think that they're personal, but guys aren't going to have a problem wearing them because they're "cool."

There are soooooo many different things to get him, so just use your imagination and find something special.



xoxo aubrey xoxo

Present Problems

need something to get my girlfriend for xmas (my sister showed me your blog, im not that wierd) it has to be $20-$30, were 14/15 age group, and shes not super girly-shes not like a sports person either but stuff like a manicure is bad-her bday is on the 13th so i need 2 pressents!!!!!!
-- Jack

Why don't you get her a gift card to like hollister or something? Or maybe you could get her a peice of jewelry she'd like, so she'd be reminded of you every time she wore it (ask ur sister for help again). or if she's nerdy get her a book. oooh or maybe an itunes gift card. and if gift cards are too impersonal for you, write her a letter about why/how much u love her and all the good times you've had.

xoxo Aubrey & Opal xoxo

Bored to Death

i can never think of anything fun to do with my frinds....like super duper fun!!! its boys and girls and like a bunch o them. what do you suggest. (we don't like to spend too much $$$ but still some if needed, not more then $20) oh and its cold....so nothing outside. more like what can we do when we go to someones house????????????
-boring social life

well, i'm not going to pretend to be like an expert on having fun or anything........... usually my friends and i go out to the movies or go shopping. But maybe you guys could do something like truth or dare, i mean, i know it can be kind of boring, but w/ the right questions it can be very amusing. you guys could go out to coffee, too, or just plan a movie night or something. Oh! and also, maybe you could invite some new people (i know that might be a little weird, but fresh ideas are always good) and see how that goes. lol i keep wanting to say something like, "have a spa day!" but that might be a little weird for the guys, although making them go to school with nail polish on could be funny.
<3 Opal

i was reading your blog. what is "friends with benefits" anyway?
-- Anonymous

for anyone who's confused, the term friends with benefits refers to the relationship of two people taking part in some kind of sexualt activity together, with out being boyfriend and girlfriend (or boyfriend and boyfriend/girlfriend and girlfriend). so ur friends, but u get benefits like sex and feeling each other up w/ no emotional attachments.
<3 Opal

Bad History

over the weekend i went to a party. we played normal party games and stuff like that. so i ended up making out with this one guy. he is kinda "off-limits", not like girlfriend "off-limits" like bad history* with me and my friends (but i couldn't not, I AM NOT A CHICKEN!!)and he is a REALLY good kisser. like really really. everytime i think about him i smile and now i think i might like him, but i can't because of what he did to his past gfs and my friends. i don't know what to do, b/c i know i don't like him, but at the moment i can't stop thinking about him!!!!!!! help me now!!!!! please!!!!!!!!!!
-NEED HELP LIKE NOWWWWWW!!!!!!!

*he cheated on like half his girlfriends and made out with another girl infront of my bff when they were dating. hes not like sketchy bad, just really hot and hard to resist. also he got really drunk one time and we had to hide him in my friends basement all night cuz he couldnt go home cuz his parents would kill (i mean it)and he threw up and everything and was crazy at the begining and madeout with like everyone there and other things i will not mention. but hes not a jerk, even though he sounds like one, he is really nice like at school and things like that, just very like makey-outy. you know what i mean?

Not to sound mean, or anything, but this guy sounds like a total ass! I mean, i'm sorry, but if he can't keep his hormones to himself, maybe he shouldn't be dating. I know you may not have dating on ur mind, but seriously, have u ever tried the whole "friends w/ benefits" thing? it sucks, and eventually u get so wrapped up that ur dating anyway. do u really wanna get cheated on by this guy? honestly, why do u guys still give losers like him the time of day? idc if he's an abercrombie model, if he treats girls like that, he obviously doesn't have any respect for u. I think u probably like him in a physical way right now, b/c he's such a good kisser. try finding a crush to take ur mind off of him.
<3 Opal

Confused Crush

Anonymous said...
So I really like this guy in my english class, but we have been school friends for around a year. I kinda think that he might maybe like me too, but i can't tell at all. he doesn't really hang out with anyone cause hes really busy with soccer, so i can't ask any of his friends because thay don't know. i have liked him for a while, but i don't know what to do. i don't really want to wait, and i have been freindly and everyhting around him. i just want to know if he likes me back because its driving me CRAZY!!! how can i tell if he likes me?

Well first things first, does he have a girlfriend? If he does, he's off limits, at least for the time being. If he doesn't then definetly go for it. You really need to be stratigic about how you approach it though because depending on what type of guy he is, flirting levels are different. Basically, if hes spending time with girls a lot, hes obviously used to flirting, so maybe just being nice isn't enough; as opposed to a guy who is involved with his studies or other activities like sports, and doesn't have time for girls, which seems to be the case here. You need to ask yourself some questions like why you like him or if you're even ready for a boyfriend, especially one who may not have enough time for you due to soccer, before you decide to pursue this because you need to decide if he's worth it. If you decide that you really like him still, then, I know this may be hard but it works, so just tell him how you feel and get it over with. If he says he doesn't like you, move on. Obviously it wasn't ment to be. Don't try to beg him to like you or be really clingy and stalk him to make him like you either or you'll look desperate. Just accept it. Now if you're too afraid to do that, just get your friends to ask around. A little investigation couldn't hurt. Just have a friend you trust do it, otherwise it could end up bad with rumors flying around that you like him and if he doesn't like you, that will make the rejection ten times worse. Now if he does happen to like you, I say that you should wait for him to ask you out, but if you feel comfortable enough, then go ahead and you ask him. Whatever you decide to do, let me know what happens because this happens to plenty of people, and I want this to turn out well for you.
Good Luck!!
xoxo Aubrey xoxo

Gossip Problems

sad sista said...
theres this gossip page going around about my school and it says something about me that is not true. is this legal what they are doing or is there anything i can do about it? how can i find out who it might be?

Actually, that's called slander and it's definitely NOT legal. if you can afford a lawyer, you could probably make a case. if the gossip page is an email, just check the address (it may be that the person is using a fake address, but if you look at it, you'll probably figure out who it is). If it's a blog, check the user name. and if it's just a peice of paper, check the hand writing. I know it'll be hard to do, but if you're a really good hacker and it's printed, you could always just figure out where it was printed from. Whatever they're saying isn't true, so do stuff that proves it. if it says you're a slut, don't date for awhile, or keep one bf for a long time. just try to make people realize that whatever it said wasn't true.
<3 opal

Sick of Her

i really really need your help. there is this girl who is a complete bitch but i have to hang out with her all the time because we both work togeather. she acts nice to me to my face and then is really mean about me behind my back. what should i do??
-- Sick of the Bitch

i know it'll be hard to talk to her, but if you can just casually mention that you aren't happy with the way she's been talking about you behind your back. don't encourage her either, she's obviously not worth your time. just be icily polite to her and try to minimize the time you spend with her. for instance, instead of working as a group, suggest that you work on halves of the project seperatley. if this is a year-round thing, just try not to tell her anything important.
<3 Opal

Bra Blow-up

Tiff said...
The most embarassing thing happend in chem today. I was over the bunson burner and my water bra exploded and stained my white shirt! I had icky blue gel all over my shirt, AND i go to a co-ed school. The rest of the day all the guy said "careful, her boobs might explode on you." It was so embarrassing!! BUt it got worse, because I had to go tothe nurse and get "cleaned up" which meant I had to go to the lost and found and find a bra, which turned out to be the kind with the mesh material that makes your boobs all pointy. And the only shirt they had there was one that smelled like sweat and feet.
I don't know if I really want advice right now, or to move to another school.

We understand your pain, we really do. I really think that everyone has at least one time in there life where they have completely humiliated themselves infront of a group of people and wanted to transferr schools. Obviously this already happend, and there really isn't anything you can do about it but if the boys make fun of you, just be like, "That's getting really old," or you could try, "that's really immature." Besides, you really shouldn't care what they say because they are only trying to hurt you, but don't let it bother you because when something embarassing happens to them, you'll have something to bug them about. Not to say that you should because that isn't the way to solve anything, but if they happen to metion your mis-hap, you can just say, "Remember when...." That should make them be quiet. I have this kid in my school who calls me and my best friend acne face. It's really mean, but i really don't care because he isn't my friend so his opinion doesn't matter to me. Again, as i said before, everyone gets pimples and have normal teenage problems just like you so don't listen to what boys say, because they are just boys. Besides, do you really think that them saying this stuff is really going to affect you in the long run? No it shouldn't. Eventually this will pass over whether they forget about it or someone else makes a fool out of themselves and they pick on them next. In which case you should stick up for them because you've been in their postion. Thanks for your question and we hope we helped you.

xoxo The Experts xoxo

Eating Issues

so i just saw my firend after the summer break...and she looked abnormally skinny. now before the break she was on a diet and im glad that she stuck to it...but now she was braggina about her diet and her body and its getting on my nerves. like, she loooks anorexic. and me im not stick skinny, but im muscular, and she is like, i wonder whose this are skinnier, yours or mine, but she is bitchy about it. imean shes been my friend for a long time and stuff, and if she has a eating problem, then i should be there for her. but i cant take the bragging much longer.............
michelle

Well, the ideal way to deal with it would be to just let her know that the way she's been talking to you is getting on your nerves, but that's not likely and u can't just walk out on her. you'll probably regret it later. Try changing the subject everytime she brings it up, or maybe you could just subtley hint that you don't like the subject. as for her having an eating disorder, i don't think you can like really ask her about that, unless you're really straight forward with her. i guess you could watch to see if she eats, but u wouldn't really know if she was bulimic. I guess if she looses any more weight u should talk to her about it. at least to say that she's getting so thin that it's creepy.

Rumor Problems

Canidee said...
OMG, I have this horrible reputation of dating too many guys. People call me a slut and I don't know what to do! The rumors that are going around are horrible, but true. How do I lost my reputation and stop those rumers?


well, since the rumors are true, u can't prove them false, so this is going to be difficult. I guess what ur going to have to do is be on ur best behavior and not mess around or date anyone so that eventually people start to think, "oh, well i guess she's not as much of a slut as i thouht she was." or u can date just one guy to prove u don't date around. I don't want to be harsh, but u've kind of gotten urself into this situation and now the only thing u can do is try to prove ur better than that. oh and don't retaliate when people call u a slut. people tend to talk more when they don't like a person so if u act nice, maybe people will start to like u and feel bad about talking behind ur back and just generally being bitchy to u.
<33 Opal

Not to insult you or anything, but if the rumors are true, then they aren't rumors, and there is really nothing you can do about them because, well, they are true. That's what happens when you do things you probably shouldn't be doing. So maybe you just shouldn't date anyone for a while and like opal said, they may start to change their minds.
xoxo Aubrey xoxo

Text Trouble

So last month a bunch of my guy friends got a hold of my cell number and passed it out to their friends...The next week I got texts from a guy who goes to a different school, but I knew his name and hadn't seen him before. He was sending me stuff like hey, you're my gurl and stuff like that and flirting thru texts!! It's so annoying and confusing because when I was like we should go to the movies, he would always be busy! I don't know what to do! How can I like a guy that I've never met before?????
--Text trouble

When I read this, a red flag went up. You don't know this guy, and for ALL you know, he could be a fourty year old man. I just don't think that it's safe for you to be even texting this guy, let alone meeting him. Now obviously I can't stop you from meeting him, but if you do decide to meet him, bring friends with you and when you see him, if he looks at all "not safe" just go to a movie with your buds. But if he looks okay to approach, have your friends tag along with you on the date so that you won't be alone with a guy you just met. All I'm trying to say is stay safe because there can be a lot of strange people out there.

xoxo Aubrey xoxo

Ok, well first of all, ask him to the movies, but let him choose the day. I hate to be negative, but if he tells you he can't do it until like next month, or if he backs out at the last minute, he probably doesn't really like you and just thinks it's funny. i know it's confusing, but if this guy goes to another school and never seems to have time for you, you should probably set your sights on someone in your own school. You may like him now, but it seems like you haven't really gotten to know him yet. I don't mean to make your crush seem trivial, but you probably like him just because he's shown interest in you. If he's flirting with random girls over texts, he's probably a bit of a jerk.
-- Opal

I like this guy who's in my French class at school and I think he likes me because he likes to go out of his way to talk to me and he laughs a lot around me. How can I be sure he likes me and if he does, how can I get him to ask me out or something?
-- Confused Crush

I know this sounds dumb and cliched, but just act friendly to him and maybe ask him to go to the movies if ur going w/ a group of people. Not in a date way. Just say something like, "Are you going to the movies w/ this, that, and the other person." That'll show him ur interested. There's no fool proof way to get a guy to ask u out. Sometimes, they just need a little help, and sometimes, they just can't work up the nerve.
-- Aubrey and Opal

Hopless Romantic

Hopeless Romantic said...
I like guys. That's not the problem. But guys just don't seem to like me. What should I do to get them to notice me? So I asked the experts:
The Experts say...I know that we said you can ask any question, but we sortof didn't want advice questions. But we do have another blog that we are currently creating for advice called Ask Aubrey where these question are great. We'll post that url soon!
So that's why I'm here. Can you help me?

Well Hopeless Romantic, all I can say is be yourself around them. Don't try to get their attention by acting out because that could send them the wrong message. Just try to become their friend and see where it goes from their. Tell me how things turn out!

xoxo Aubrey xoxo